Just

Just had this thought... I am 32 years old and just bought my own house about 3 months ago. Mind you, I am almost as single and waiting as they come. But today I just got hit with something profound and I wanted to invoke conversation and also come to you to see what you think about this. So I looked around (and I promise it wasn't in a silly tone even though it may sound like it) and said literally out loud. I'm going to have sex in this house. Okay, let's wave the elephant in the room. I am a virgin. Yes, that word. But I digress. I share this with you because sometimes I feel captive in this unicorn universe of what that means. Sex, I imagine, can be passionate. Fierce. Like a woman exercising their prowess. But because I know I'm going to be in this house for awhile, I know that I will find my husband soon and then fill this house. So in a way, by allowing my mind to entertain curiosities of "future," this has given me the privilege of casting a vision and speaking it out into existence (self-prophecy). Later in the evening, I had this heightened sense of self and my dreamcasting went further.. "I will have BABIES in this house!!" It hit me that I will use some of the rooms of this home that I have bought to build a family in this place!! And because I have a naturally crunchy mind and heart, next was the natural excitement of "I will ACTUALLY birth babies in this house!!" And honestly, you know, it's hard to see the fog from the clouds in the trail that my horrible dating history has left but tonight has shifted my eyes. I am envisioning every good thing that I know that Lord wants me. Tonight it literally went to the level of me envison WHICH ROOM I would birth my babies in! And before you know it I'm on Amazon.com getting the size of various birthing tubs to see if it'd fit in that room. I know for perhaps the most average thinker this may be viewed as crazy or pintrest-esque. But I promise my visions do not include sugar plum fairies. Listen, I get what you are thinking but I mean it!! I am making an extremely conscious effort here to plan for my prophecy. I'm going to map it out not in control but in expectation. I recognize God directs my path so I am just going to prepare my heart in the meantime. Anyways, thanks for letting my share my intimate heart moment with the Lord and my prophetic dream-casting from tonight. Hope this inspires and I hope you read this knowing that the Lord wants everything GOOD for you and He is a good Father who will not withhold a single GOOD thing. So don't settle, dream on, babes! <3 So much love. My heart is full!!!!

A Single, Yellow Rose

I want to tell you a little story. My grandmother was not a Believer at all during her lifetime. She used phrases like, "The Lord be with you," etc but she never claimed Jesus as Lord and Savior of her life.

I remember there was a time in which my grandmother lived with us. I remember rather clearly a time where her knee pain was very severe, mind you she was likely in her late 70s at this time, to the point where she was yelling out in pain. I told her that I would pray for her. I laid hands on her knee and the pain went after several times of commanding it to go. It tried to come back and again we spoke to the pain and commanded it to go. She was very surprised that God would do this. So, knowing that the Lord was working I asked her if she wanted to learn more about Jesus. I remember opening my Word and telling her about the saving power of Christ and how He healed her because He loved her and had a plan for her life. When finished, I asked her if she would like to accept that same Jesus who healed her into her life, she said, "Not at this time." I was very upset because my heart was towards her and wanted her to welcome the Lord into her life. I thought... you can't get anymore real with the Living Savior as to encounter Him personally by Him touching you, so how will she ever come to the saving knowledge of Christ for HER.

So for years before this event and even know my heart's prayer for my family was Act 16:31 which reads, "They replied, 'Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved, along with everyone in your household.'" So that has been the Scripture that I have clung to and confessed over and over again!! This has been my war declaration for my family. For them to be saved.

Fast forward to my grandmother being in her 80s in a nursing home because her condition of Alzheimers and just general elder care required much more medical attention than we could provide her. Some days were better than others. Some were really bad. I specifically remembered that I was going to go visit her and surprise her with a bouquet of flowers. I was bound and determined to love on my grandma! I took the selfies to show my excitement. When I arrived, I was unprepared. She was not in a good mood. She clearly told me she didn't want the flowers. Alzheimer's wasn't kind to her that day. I left, bouquet in hand, tears flooding my eyes. I was so hurt. This was not the grandmother I knew. I could put stickers on a cardboard box and this woman would have, in her right mind, been ecstatically overjoyed that I took the time to make her something. She was one who always enjoyed and appreciated the details. She was a giver at heart. If you mentioned a need, you better believe she was immediately taking out her checkbook to open it and write you a check. I can't even count the times that I couldn't refuse because she just would not let me. Seriously!

Months go by and for weeks she was declining in health. Her appetite barely evident. I remember that years' Thanksgiving was tear filled and sad as we attempted to bring Thanksgiving to her. We had the traditional Thanksgiving food. She was gone. We tried to give her food and it was not a success. She barely ate and she most certainly was not there in body. It was heart breaking. We didn't even clue in to the fact that she was already slipping away from our loving arms.

Conditions worsened so my aunt flew in from NY to be with us. Come November 19th, we were bedside alternating between playing music that she loved, speaking last words, etc. We had a chaplain come in because I knew that hearing was the last thing to go. I explained to him the situation, telling him that I don't think she had accepted the Lord and it's so important for her to know how to enter into Heaven. Prayers were lifted, tears were shed. In the late evening hours, her breathing became infrequent and several times we were asking each other if this was "it." This time is an odd moment for us frail humans. We are in this world and certainly subject to it. We do not have all the answers and timing is normally of ways of the spiritual world do not alway become clear to us. So waited we did. My heart broke. Time bedside when someone close is passing is a very funny thing. In doing so, humor becomes a way of dealing with the overwhelming sense of grief. It was very late and had entered into the next day, so admittedly, my grandma's neighbor had a bunch of wigs on styrofoam heads so I am not going to lie to you here... we "borrowed" them for our light amusement, taking pictures and videos and pulling all kinds of shenanigans. I'll never know if a person decides to let go at a certain moment of this world for the next or if it was just God's timing, but this was the moment, in the moment of laughter that my grandmother left this world. I like to think that in the laughter she found freedom and made her decision to be at peace with what was happening to her frail and failing body. And so she passed.

We each had our time to share with her in private. When it was my turn, it was was an odd feeling to be in the room when you knew someone's spirit wasn't in the body. You see, my grandmother didn't look like herself anymore as she was passing but knowing that she wasn't there was a very crazy thing. But in that moment my heart and spirit were pulled. I prayed to God with what seemed like EVERY ATOM in my body. It was not just a prayer request, it was a DEMAND. You promised me, Lord, that me and my household WOULD BE SAVED. I need to know she is with you. I need to know that she accepted you as Lord and Savior. (And what we always say as Christians not to do, I did.) I asked God for a sign. I said, God if she accepted you as Lord, someone will give me a red, rose.... then I said in my heart, no yellow because that is friendship. I said, a SINGLE, YELLOW ROSE. I needed to know and there was NO other way that I could know in my heart and have peace unless He showed up and showed me. That would be three signs in one: 1. Must be yellow. 2. Must be a rose. 3. Someone must give it to me.

At her funeral, I had arrived early. My beautiful friend, Madison, came 3 hours to cater it. I walked through the doors and went straight back and went to make a sharp right to where Madison had setup for us. Out of the corner of my eye, my eye caught something to the left. Behind the glass administration windows, in the office, was a single, yellow rose (all by itself) in a vase in the desk. I couldn't believe my eyes. I burst into tears. I knew that No one knew the sign I asked for. No one knew that I had compelled the Lord to show me! I knocked on the window and there was an employee there. He opened and I asked him if he could put in near me so I could take a picture of it. I told God that it was alright if I only got 2 of the 3 signs. Granted, I was specific but I know God enough to know that this is Him when I see it. I asked him where it came from and he said he really didn't know. So just when I had accepted that this was God's sign, I asked the employee to take a picture of it. It was then that God just showed off. The employee responded, "You can have it, if you want." At that point, if my tears weren't already building myself a puddle, I just lost it. 3-for-3! No question. My grandma was with the Lord.

I'm not sure exactly why I'm sharing this with you other than the fact that I came across this picture on my computer and felt compelled to tell you this story. Interestingly enough we are coming up on her 4 years in Heaven. God is so good though. The fact that He could show me this sign is beautiful. The fact that He could perform a break-through moment of showing Himself to her amidst severe Alzheimers at her passing, is totally miraculous.

I am ever amazed at the limitless access we have to the Father. He is gracious beyond measure and faultless in every way. When I think my life is hard or that the challenges I'm facing are too difficult, this is a perfect reminder that God is not subject to my circumstance. My circumstances are SUBJECT to my God. So today, I choose to believe that God orders my steps. In 30 days, I don't know where I am living. There are so many moving parts to this equation. Questions flood my mind more than answers, these days.

But here's what I continue to confess through this post:

"And my God will liberally supply (fill until full) your every need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus." Philipians 4:19

"The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way." Psalm 37:23

"He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken." Psalm 62:6

"...for though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again..." Proverbs 24:16

"We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain," Hebrews 6:19

"For He will give His angels charge concerning you, To guard you in all your ways." Psalm 91:11-12

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord" Colossians 3:23

Field of Daisies

The invigorating smell of summer-infused air floats through the wind and makes its way through my Spirit as I take in its breath. I hear nature confessing its mystery in stories intertwined with the musical lullaby of feathered beings. A song of an old memory, one of my hidden soul and the tale of my creation. It's here in this place that nothing else matters, all noise and chaos-enducing thoughts are cancelled. Surrounding me there is a lush green background of rolling hills which have delicately arranged specks of yellow from playful daisies . I'm free to be me and not wonder if the flowers will judge my desire for freedom, knowing their very essence is flowing with each of the wind's unpredictable invitations to a new dance. They too are secure to be carefree and dance. Surrounded by their wonderful glory, I twirl in their company, sharing in their secret enjoyment to life's beauty. I desperately attempt to capture the memory of the beautiful composite of colors that soften my view with each twirl. The delightful color of green and yellow blend into a dazzling swirl of a perfect love story. Arising from my spirit comes the glee that only a child without hesitation knows. Bubbling with secrets left to tell, a kindling laughter builds from the center of my heart. My beaming, smiling laughter is streaked with discovery and revelation. Wonder fills my eyes, floods my mind, and sparks my heart of the simplicity of such a surrounding. The amazement of how profound an impact this ambiance embodies awakens to life and redefines 'Happiness.' The apple in my cheeks blush with the discovery of this sweeping beautiful journey. My skin is brushed by the sun, as a sign of His love, sending His last kisses of the day as a goodnight to me upon my cheek. The glow's fading presence seems to be winking in its last moments, reminding me that He's with me. I savor the essence of the day I've had with Him by picking a daisy and follow it to my golden hair. As I perfectly place the innocent floral decoration I hear Him say, "Do you like the flowers I made especially for you?" At this, my heart is enveloped with everlasting warmth and another childlike smile embraces my face......

Shannon Psotta
April 2009

How come 75% Of The Word Diet is "Die?"

DIET--It is and might forever be classified as that dirty, little 4-letter word! hahahaha



Today is Day One for Mission Food Possible! So far so good but my sources (my belly rumbles) tell me I'm still hungggggggggry. LOL

So off to Wal-Mart very soon I shall be!! Fruit aisle here I come! Wal-Mart betta have stocked fruit up the wazzzzoo! Me and a friend from Mississippi are doing it together. I wish I had a Wii Fit like she does though... then I'd be working out but having fun... for now it'll just be working out and "bearing" it. hah.

Since I'm going to Orlando, FL in a little over a month (April 22nd to be exactly)... I gotta be looking fly!!!! ;) Not that bikini is an option but hey, we can dream, right? Maybe one of these days... as for now I'll work on the small things and hopefully there will be a good amount of difference between the 'me' NOW and the 'me' THEN.

Until next blog.... keep it real, homies!

:P

Boldy Proclaim

Let the miracles flow as Your children mirror Heaven, the place from which no lack prevails. Let me be the one to expect You to do the miraculous. Father, open my eyes to the spiritual world that exists on this very earth so I may let Your Heaven penetrate this earth, tearing through circumstance that divide the truth from lies. Lord, I will pull on You to believe the unbelievable. I will trust in You to show me the limitless power of Your Hand. Broaden my mind, let the Word, "Healer" be vitally & eternally tied to Your Name, alone, Jesus.

Show me visions of Your Will for healing on this earth so that I may bold proclaim the Gospel through the manifestation of Your glory and power in signs and wonders. Give me the gumption to faithfully travel my life's unchartered territory that I may take back the territory that the devil has unrightfully stolen from Your precious created children.

Father let the result of my boldness through testifying be of that in Luke 21:13 [The Living Bible],

"But as a result, the Messiah will be widely known and honored. Therefore, don't be concerned about how to answer the charges against you, for I will give you the right words and such logic that none of your opponents will be able to reply! Even those closest to you--your parents, brothers, relatives, and friends will betay you and have you arrested; and some of you will be killed. And everyone will hate you because you are mine and are called by my name. But not a hair of your head will perish! For if you stand firm, you will win your souls."

Father my prayer is that I will stand firm in my faith in You, so I will not be harmed and I may win the lost wandering souls of the earth.

Let us be humble enough to submit ourselves to you, but not complacent. Let us be bold enough to show Your wonderous mercy, grace (Your willingness to do anything on our behalfs), and love without being religious and robotic, numb and stale to the amazement of You.

In being humble, my prayer is that I not say NO to Your small requests of obediences. Father, whatever you bid me, let me willingly and cheerfully do. Let Your leading usher me into the jaw-dropping wonders you are so anxious to display. Father let me be sensitive because as Your Word declares in Zechariah 4:6, "Not by might, not by power, but by my Spirit, says the Lord."

Let me be the light unto the nations, shining full of the Jesus in me!

We have the last laugh...

Twisting stories, making up lies,
Blurring spiritual vision, full of alibis.
Undermining authority and aimed to kill,
Leaving death in his wake, it's his thrill.
Trapping youth from freedom's song,
Taunting minds, "You don't belong."
Painting a picture to cover his tracks,
Using what's fake to contort the facts.
Crafting and hoping you sit in your shame,
Pointing his fingers that you're to blame.
Whispering tales of woven lies spun,
Pain is his gimmick, death is his fun.
Laughing as you fall, trip and stumble,
Waiting for your life to spiral or crumble.
Planning your destruction to the tee,
Mapping out to such precise degree.
Snickering at sin, his childish game,
How he forgets his temporary fame.
Suddenly blocked, his hands become tied,
Kept from action, stopped in his pride.
All the plans, in the beginning great and tall,
Surely will divide against themselves and fall.
The chains once secured upon sinner's souls,
To Jesus' power, no longer possessively controlled.
Free from bonds and purchased with a cost,
Delivered fom fears, all darkness is lost.
We're found wrapped tightly under God's wing,
Under His covering, warmth He brings.
Clothing the shame, mending our hearts,
Wiping away our tears, a brand new start.
The devil's devices shut down from success,
It's there he's met with many regrets.
Death is broken, sin will fade,
In Christ's image we will finally be made.
The glory and mercy of God rules the land,
His children victorious, righteously stand.

Why I'm Single...

This is an actual message that I received on Yahoo Personals as a dating message. This horrible message has literally inspired me to continually post the rediculous messages that I receive for your humorous enjoyment and my ego busting!

Here goes my ego.....

"On 12/05/2008 10:42 pm EST, CL wrote:

HEY SHONNON MY NAME IS COREY, i AM SIINGLE. i TRAVEL ALOT, i LOVE AN INTELECTUAL BANTERS( NOT MUCH AS TO HAVE TO DEBATE MY...PLENTY HEAR AND THE MILLITRANT MIDGET WAYITNG IN YOUR TUB WITH A BUTCHER KNIFE. THERE TERARY SHOULD MATTER BECAUSE THEIR PELTING SADAMN SNOW MAN, HE WENT THE THE LOOSE.......iF DEBATE IS AN INTELECTUAL PRESENTED, I WILL NOT GIVIN.

i AM A BARREL IF MONKIES IN A BARREL
i SELDOM SMOKING
i DRINK EVEN MORE WITH COMMPANIONS, SOMEBODY HAS TO DRIVE.

dO YOU LIKE THE LEAF ANF TWIG, i THOUGHT MAYBE IF YOU HAD A MEETING THERE YOU WOULD LOVE IT.

So don't be affraid its just a burger and a soda....Hope to hear from you

CLHardesty"

If you can decode this message, I'd love to know what the crap you think this eligible bachelor is saying. And to address your concern of my well-being, no I didn't respond and no, I've never heard of the "Leaf and Twig." But I will definately put that (probably) tavern on my "NEVER TO GO TO" list!!!

hahahahahahahahahahahah!